Sunday, January 28, 2007

Runs with Scissors

There's some sort of entity in my apartment, with a pair of shears. I'm serious here. It has an infatuation with trimming my cat's tail, and then arranging it out symmetrically on the floor as if it's laying railroad ties. This is the second time it's happened, and when both my wife and I were present.

I noticed Kaga was in the small washroom (it's a closet with a washer and dryer, really). He likes to climb behind the washing machine, where he gets stuck and calls for help. To keep track here, it seems to be Kenichi that's losing the hair. When i turned around from putting the next load in the dryer, there was the patch of fur - perpendicular to the hall, directly behind me. This being the second time i let out an audible "huh." Huh, indeed.

I called Chloe, she also recognized it right away. Huh. Kenichi was down the hall at this point, and i asked "Is that your hair?" He trotted to about 2 feet away, where he then went into "frightened" mode, slowly sneaking up on his wake of black shedding, freaking out and running to undeneath one of the barstools in the dining room.

I laid down next to him, inspecting his tail (the only area with hair long enough to match the patch on the floor). Huh. Intact. On top of that, it took quite a bit of pressure to get only a few strands out, let alone clumps large enough to cover the same surface area of my palm.

Prowling, he slithered his way back into the hall, stepping around the cord to the vacuum as if putting pressure in the wrong spot would unleash a flurry of arrows from the gaping maws of ancient Aztec protectors. "You throw me the idol, i throw you the whip." He was scared of that spot on the floor. I don't blame him. I'll be sure to turn the hall light every time I just pass by.

Next time he drops some of his coat we'll take a picture. This is weird shit. There are two things that have my genetics* concerned. Firstly, this complex was built on a past site of the insane asylum St. Agnews. Most of the campus is still across the street, but i think they currently do some R&D for the tech industry.

Perhaps some ectoplasmic entity, like a barber who went crazy from wanting to charge more than two bits for a shave and a haircut, has been cropping unkempt quaffs from beyond. That would actually be rad: maybe Sweeny Todd has been living somewhere between limbo and my laundry.

Secondly, Audra recently purchased us a brilliant gift. It's a red velvet canvas on which someone mounted a hammered brass Spanish Galleon. Words, nor this cellphone photo do it any sort of justice. My thinking says there's a clue to our groomer's motives behind that ship. I wonder if Chloe will notice if a couple of sails are gone?

*Being Mexican I have a predisposition to the supernatural, and have never heard of Will Ockham.

1 comment:

slskenyon said...

Well, it beats the whole brushing/grooming process given it seems automatic in this case.